What they say, my interpretations, then my secret (sometimes verbalized) thoughts:
Them: “im good cheers id like 2 see them boobs”
My interpretation: Just another cheapass, just looking for free boob flashes.
What I’d really like to say (and often do): “then face the mirror, take your shift off and enjoy. My dear, those the the only boobs you’re going to see for that price. ”
Them: “wheres the vagina”
My Interpretation: Where’s your vagina?
What I’d really like to say (and often do): “Between my legs, dude.”
Them: “hi sexy….may i c ur ass”
My Interpretation: While everyone else gives gold for these peeks, I expect them for free. Not entirely free, however, because I did just compliment you.
What I’d really like to say (and often do): (Pointing toward a Boobs For Gold sign on the whiteboard behind me) “It isn’t ‘boobs for gold, ass for free’.”.
Them: “you here for awhile? waiting for wifey to go to bed”
My Interpretation: So he’s allowed to chat with me and watch as I show boobs for gold in the free room, but is not allowed to go private and enjoy himself until his wife is sleeping.
What I’d really like to say (and often do): “I can just picture you, at a computer desk, looking over your shoulder every 10 seconds to make sure the wife doesn’t walk in and see this.” *snicker*
Them: “emailed you for a pic :-)”
My Interpretation: Trying for a freebie. Trying for a freebie. Will it work…?
What I’d really like to say (and often do): “Nice try but you know only givers of 5 gold get the goods.”
Them: “my name is lucifer….may i make friends with u ??”
My Interpretation: He’s terribly misunderstood.
What I’d really like to say (and often do): “Don’t you have a Star Trek convention to attend, or something along those lines?”
Them: “what is the maximum you can do for gold not in private? i know there is regulation”
My Interpretation: Wanted the most bang for his buck (the buck that he never ended up giving, likely based on my answer).
What I’d really like to say (and often do): “Really want the most bang for your buck, huh? Well, as per site rules, I’m only permitted to show frontal nudity and ass.”
(After a boob flash for another member who gave gold):
Them: “I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AMANDA”
My Interpretation: He loves my boobs.
What I’d really like to say (and often do): “Awwwww.”
Drumroll please …
And that was my night. It was a good one though. I had fun and did alright.