What We’re Worth

     The more frustrated I am with work, the more I start to take days off. At least that’s what my boyfriend says and he has a valid point. That said, I spent last night in the calm, quiet comforts of home, with my dog and my boyfriend, all of us sweating our sorry asses off for not having installed the air conditioner yet, with temperatures soaring and the humidex factor rising to 30 celsius. The fan didn’t bring any relief. One thing’s for certain though, despite our bodies drenched in perspiration, hair sticking to the back of my neck, all the windows open but no breeze coming in, all this combined, making for the most unbearable conditions otherwise; it’s never too hot for sex!

     After the sex, a long walk, a few episodes of Family Guy and a little indulgence with freezies and Bold & Beautiful, I found myself back to a somewhat normal state of mind. I was finally freed from the stress and complications of work, with no worries of  how slow the traffic is, how much I would have to endure from my stalker’s nightly visits (I block them incessantly, yet they return constantly) and the overall sense of de-ja-vu I get when I start to see these occurrences.

     Sometimes, I swear I’m made to feel like a pawn, being controlled and played. To make a move is to take a risk. If I make my move, and it’s the wrong one, I lose a piece of the game. I’m only allowed to play the pawns, the pieces with the least amount of flexibility and control. The ones that move forward and get eaten all the time by the bigger pieces. No matter how far I advance toward the opponent’s end, the same fate awaits me.

     Brings me to wonder, generally speaking – what are we really worth, as pawns? Does anyone ever feel like they are more than just a pawn in this game? While companies set up shop, making everything member-friendly, providing all the bells and whistles it takes to make their bottom line happy, who’s looking out for our interests? What are we worth?